Ben Stevens at the South Carolina Family Law blog posted the following about frequently heard comments from his client’s spouses. I share Ben’s philosophy about such comments and wanted topass them on in this post:
"I Family Court cases, it is not uncommon for people to make remarks to intimidate, upset, and/or cause stress for each other. Because of the close relationships the parties previously had with each other, they usually know just which remarks to make to cause the maximum response on the intended victim.
Since these types of comments unfortunately are made all too often, our firm strives to make our clients and potential clients aware of them to help minimize their impact. We urge our clients to refrain from making these types of remarks, as they only create more stress for them, more work for us, and more expense in their cases.
These typical remarks can include some or all of the following:
- “I am going to drag this case out forever. By the time you get your share of the property, you’ll be too old to enjoy it.”
- “If you persist in your financial demands, I am going to file a custody action and take the children away from you.”
- “I’ve got the best lawyer in town. He’s going to crush you and your lawyer.”
- “My lawyer is mean. He’s going to make your life miserable.”
- “Your lawyer is a crook. His only interest is to drag out the case in order to make more money.”
- “You’ve gotten yourself the most expensive lawyer around. The two lawyers are going to eat up all of the assets that we acquired during the marriage.”
- “My lawyer knows all of the judges. There’s no way that you are going to get a decent result in Court.”
- “I was ready to give you a fair settlement. Now that you got a lawyer, I am going to play hard ball and you’re going to end up with much less than I was willing to give you.”
- “I’m going to take the children and you will never see them again.”
- “You’re crazy for pushing this divorce case. All that you are doing is taking money away from the children.”
- “If you don’t settle on a reasonable basis, I will have to take the children out of school.”
- “I’m going to tell the children that you are responsible for this mess.”
- “At the rate you and your lawyer are going, I’ll have to declare bankruptcy and nobody is going to win.”
- “If you don’t settle on my terms, I’m going to drag your girlfriend (or boyfriend) into this case.”
- “Your lawyer is too busy to handle this case.”
- “You can’t trust lawyers. They always work with the lawyer on the other side and run up unnecessary time to make more money.”
Hopefully, the opposing party in your case isn’t the type who makes such outrageous statements. On the other hand, you could be on the receiving end of such remarks or of variations on these themes. Fortunately, there is rarely is any basis for such comments, and they are usually made to provoke a desired response.
We want to assure our clients and potential clients that with regard to these types of comments, our firm’s position is the following:
- Our attorneys and office staff are experienced in Family Court cases, and you can be assured that we are not going to be intimidated by any such statements made by the opposing party in your case.
- If you have any concerns about any statements the opposing party makes, please discuss them with us.
- We work for you. Our job is to work on your behalf and to take reasonable and necessary steps to help you obtain your desired results in your case.
- Finally, we take pride in our adherence to the strictest of ethical standards. You can always count on our integrity and good faith in representing you."
SOURCE: South Carolina Family Law blog